Friday, September 5, 2014

Exploration 36

Page 101, The Truth About Inanimate Objects

The purpose of this exercise is to capture the hidden life of inanimate objects and then tell their stories.


This is the story of Donald Driver(but we all call him Driver), my Green Bay Packers gnome. Generally, Driver sits on our coffee table and observes our everyday lives. He stares at us with his big silly grin, and will illuminate our living room with his ghostly lantern at night. However, when we leave the house, I believe he loves causing mayhem. He enjoys meandering about our apartment and exploring.

When I first purchased Driver I could tell there was something slightly odd about him. I had never had an inanimate object move around with no explanation before. At first, I thought I was crazy. I would find him laying on the ground, knocked over and would just assume someone had bumped him. My roommates all swore that they never touched him,though. So, one day, I decided to leave the apartment at my usual time, but then I came back early in order to catch the culprit that was moving my precious gnome. You would not believe my surprise when I witnessed Driver hop off of the coffee table and strut down our hallway-on his own!

Here Driver is, just taking a stroll down our hallway as if it is the most natural thing in the world. I manged to snap this picture without him noticing. I could not fathom where he would be heading with such purposeful strides. It took me a minute to collect my thoughts and when I looked back he was gone!


Now, I had no idea where my gnome had vanished to, but I think that I handled everything very well. I did not scream, run away, and I even manged to resist the temptation of calling my Catholic Priest for an exorcism! After a few moments of shocked silence I decided to find out where Driver had wandered off to.




Turns out, he was in the shower. I guess this was his subtle way of letting me know that he enjoyed being a clean gnome, and took pride in that. He was slightly embarrassed that I had found him, but said that he was happy that I knew why he sometimes was not where he was supposed to be. I guess having a gnome that likes to be clean is better than having one that is possessed by an evil spirit!





1 comment:

  1. Great story! When I was younger, my grandfather evilly told me that dolls came to life when I was sleeping. After that, I would always act like I was sleeping but actually would stare at my porcelain dolls all night long. I got super scared once, because I thought I saw one doll turn its head. I ran to my parents' bedroom screaming the entire way down the hall. It took days for them to fully convince me that my dolls were not alive.

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